Longevity

First a nice joke.

I am not keen on taking pills. So, when my doctor gave me a prescription to lower my blood pressure, I asked him if there were any side effects.

"Yes," he said, "Longevity".

Even though I wrote about keeping the worries to a minimum in the last blog, one of the things I am worried about seriously is longevity. One thing I don't want to do is to live longer. ("Anyone up there? do you hear me?")

Like in this joke, I don't want to do anything which will have a side effect of longevity. Though I like walking, people are threatening me that I will end up living longer this way. I am in a quandry now. Whether to walk or not?


There are many things like that. Even though I have carefully avoided doing any physical exercise, the low-key lifestyle and walking seem to have a negative fallout on longevity. What can I do to have a nice time now, but still end up dying early, I wonder. How to have the cake and eat it too? Any suggestions?

I tried to make a list of 'evils' - which are normally considered as joy for the present, but worry for the future. I thought, it may be helpful to pick up some bad habits, which may facilitate my eagerness to avoid longevity. But, I can't stand smoking. So, that is ruled out. Liquor etc. seem to result in we losing consciousness, which I am totally opposed to. Unfortunately, I have a very uncooperative palate - not liking things which are considered good to reduce longevity. I still like food with chillies and salt - so, there is some hope to contract blood pressure, I guess.

Many of the bad habits also seem to have an element of addiction and overdoing. So, I have decided to get addicted to some habits and overdo them, hoping that this will help in my aim. Now, I listened to music non-stop at home, we watch movies regularly - almost daily? - ranging from cartoon films to 'chick flicks', peppered with James Bond and slapstic comedy ones. Of course, trying to surround myself with people who can infect me with sick jokes!

Mianren, the chinese god/goddess of longevity

Let me see if I succeed in my attempt. If any of you have any other brighter ideas that can help my endeavour of reducing longevity, let me know. Give me a couple of tips to offend Mianren...